Updated daily, no matter what...almost...usually....just barely.

First - Today is my birthday, but only for 25 more minutes. For my birthday, I was called to work at 7:30 in the morning and sent to Madison, Wisconsin. For those who have no idea where I live - it is not even remotely close to Madison, Wisconsin. In addition, mother nature decided to throw in some gnarly weather on the way home and we got lost TWICE. It is now 11:38 p.m. and I got home 5 minutes ago. I've had better birthdays. So, I've canceled today's birthday and re-scheduled it for tomorrow instead. I've also brought in Vanessa as guest blogger today because truth be told, I'm pretty exhausted and spacey right now. So without further ado, I present ...Vanessa!

Semantic and Pedantic

- supposively (alternately: supposibly)

- irregardless

- deep-seeded instead of deep-seated.

- "just assume" instead of "just as soon"

- "for all intensive purposes." For all intents and purposes can be understood to mean "for all practical purposes," but you tell me what an intensive purpose might be. YOU TELL ME.

- leery plus wary somehow equalling weary, as in: "I'm feeling kinda weary about going to Eric's party tonight 'cause I think Sheila might be there and she might kick my ass since I can't pay back that $100." What? You are tired about it? It is fatiguing you? Is that what you meant?

- expresso (see also: expecially, and occasionally excape)

- could/should/would of. This tends to occur in print, as of and 've are practically indistinguishable when spoken fast enough. As in: "I COULD OF paid some attention to what was going on in freshman year English but I like working third shift stocking at Walmart so much that basic literacy doesn't really seem to matter."

Anyway, not to put too fine a point on it, but these kinds of things really make me want to give people saying them a good violencing. I mean, sweet Jesus almighty and all the saints, learn to speak ya'll.

*At this point I would like to remind everyone that if I've made any spelling or grammatical errors in the non-Vanessa portion of this post, you should ignore them...because it's my birthday weekend...and I'm sleepy...because the birthday gods hate me.


Speedcat Hollydale November 8, 2008 at 12:19 AM  

Happy Birthday!!!

... and tomorrow 2 (wink)

Vanessa November 8, 2008 at 8:11 AM  

Hoppy Birdday!

At least you got home... uh... by midnight, right?

What a long-ass birthday...

Jessica November 8, 2008 at 12:30 PM  

Well, I can't speak for Vanessa but "anyways" is one of my personal pet peeves. That and "conversate." They both make my skin crawl.

Hyacynth Filippi Worth November 8, 2008 at 1:10 PM  

Happy birthday! Also, I love this post. Enjoy round two of the birthday fun.

Vanessa November 8, 2008 at 1:50 PM  

I wish I could remember all the Scott Cutterisms from years back. He had all these amazing turn-of-phrases that were like Bushisms, but more ghetto...

Anonymous,  November 8, 2008 at 8:00 PM  

happy birthday, and unbirthday. As a retired barista, "expresso" really hurts my heart. I'm writing for the contest, but I love your blog, it always makes me smile!

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Everything in this blog is copyright Jessica Benassi AKA Hey Lola except where I give credit to other people because obviously, that's their stuff. Don't steal my stuff. I mean, I'm not sure why you would want to, anyway, but if you're thinking about it...don't. Also, all of this nonsense is my opininion and is not supported or endorsed by Blogger or anyone ese. I mean, maybe it is, but if something I say just infuriates you, I take sole responsibility.

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