Jessica.: dogs

How to do Exactly the Opposite of What Everyone Expects and Have a Better Life,

by Jessica Benassi

Professional Life Coach and Expert on Figuring Stuff out about Life

Step 1:
Get a job that you're really good at. Throw yourself into it. Excel. Love it. Love it so much you want to marry it.

Step 2:
Start bringing your work home. Spread it all over your bed, and wake up with paperclips up your nose.

Step 3:
Start dreaming about work while you sleep. Wake up in the middle of the night screaming about wedding cakes.

Step 4:
Without noticing, completely lose your sense of humor.

Step 5:
Only have time to eat Doritos and orange pop. Start to turn orange.

Step 6:
Come home one night and introduce yourself to the weird guy in your living room and his 4 dogs.

Step 7:
Develop a rather obvious twitch in your eye.

Step 8:
Consider a career change. Watch an episode of "Animal Hoarders" and think "I could do that."

Step 9:
Decide to quit your awesome job in exchange for a career in waiting tables, blogging, painting pictures, selling stuff you make, working at the bar you own and hanging out with that weird guy and his 4 dogs.

Step 10:
Put on your unicorn shirt, because life just got awesome.

The moral to this story is that you should keep your feet on the ground and your head in your dreams, unless Freddy Krueger shows up, in which case you should run away really fast and maybe think about becoming an accountant or something safe like that.

Also, don't be afraid to quit your grown up job in favor of having a life. Having a life is nice, even if you don't have as much money. Or any money.

Also, can I have a dollar?

First, a suggestion for a long and happy relationship: Should you ever be tempted to shave your dog's butt with your significant other's electric shaver...don't. Apparently that makes guys mad.

Poor Gizzy Lee...he just has so much hair and it sucks having to sit still and be brushed all of the time when all you really want to do is run around and play with the other dogs. Obviously there was only one thing that I could do to make him feel better...

He's such a bad ass now, he kicks all the other dogs asses. I imagine it won't be long before he starts running around with a dog gang...probably some of these guys:

(via Sharon Montrose Photographs)

(original source unknown)

(via Virgin Media)

(original image can be found here)

(via Snapshot Parade)

Dogs with mohawks are awesome.